Get Thee to a Tentery

In Which I Help You Prepare by Stating the Obvious for You

How to prepare for our transition to the post-digital world when the economy eats all the computers and our jobs with them? By the time this annihilation is through we won’t even be analog anymore; we’ll be more … tree log. Me, I’ve got five little hunters who will also keep me warm at night, as well as a boyfriend who, I’m fairly sure, can knock over trees with his bare hands. I’m also learning Fathom to break into small things and just got her her first My First Safecracking Kit for Those With No Thumbs.

I thought about going the Arthur Dent route, but first I’d have to learn how to build a fire-fired oven and figure out where the hell yeast comes from, and that’s going to take time I just don’t have while I am sitting here editing thank-you notes “from” the president in which “he” pretends to know the details of every single gift that comes through the major university over which he is lord and master. I also had to acquire him a bootblack last week.

My point is, what is your plan for putting food on the table when we’re all vying for the same job ripping tickets at the $2.50? And how will you build that table? And can I borrow a tent? You think this economic crash and burn won’t take your kitchen table with it? You’re going to need an ax and some secret iron ore is all I’m trying to say here. West Virginians will soon be our kings, just you wait and see.